איך רושמים את זה באנגלית?

what my conversations with myself sound like when im trying to figure out whether what i did saved me or just messed up my life even more

what do my conversations with myself sound like trying to figure out if what i did saved me or further damaged my life

how my conversations with myself must sound as i try to discern whether what i have done has saved me or further sabotaged my own life.

how my conversations with myself sound when im trying to understand if what i did saved me or if i sabotaged my life even more